She twirls

Twirling, whirling, spinning

Turning, twisting, pivoting

Swiveling, revolving, rotating

That is what it feels like

As opposed to

Sinking, falling, dropping

Submerging, plunging, descending

No one is

Losing, missing, wasting

Failing, eluding, leaving

She is just going around in circles

Twirling and pivoting like a dancer

While the world is

Swiveling and revolving beyond her

The only way to get to her

Is to break into her

Spin around with her

Feel the vertigo that is her

Grasp the rhythm together

Perceive the cadence

And flow with her

She composes

She formulates

She devises

She choreographs

She plans

Contrary to what they think

She is not

Ignorant, oblivious, unaware

She is simply taken

Captured into a different world

Away from what is

Normal, ordinary, conventional

She is remarkable

She is exceptional

She is special

But she still needs you


Author’s Note:

I wrote this after watching the music video of ‘Dig’ by Incubus. It hit quite close to home. As I watched the ballerina twirl around, I realised that someone trapped in desolation does not ‘sink’ into their condition that is too often mistakenly called depression. They do not fall into desolation. I believe they are caught in it and they go around in circles within it.

Do you remember that feeling of spinning around giddily when you were little? It took you away from the world. But you loved that feeling. For a moment there, you did not want to come out of it. You wanted to watch the sky rotate above you. You wanted to feel the shadows in your closed eye swirl.

Coming out of melancholia is like stopping that twirl, being smacked with the fact that you’re getting off-balanced and finally hitting the ground really hard. No one wants that painful experience.

Brandon Boyd tells us how we could help someone in desolation:

If I turn into another

Dig me up from under what is covering

The better part of me

[Sing this song]

Remind me that we’ll always have each other

When everything else is gone

And I say, all this person needs is you by his/her side.

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