Asian parenting after-school interrogation

Questions Asian parents like to ask their kids when they get home from school:

  1. What did you get for your test?
  2. What did your friends get for the test?
  3. Did you do better than your classmates?
  4. Why are there so many mistakes?
  5. Were you being careless again?
  6. Did you get all the answers right when the teachers asked in class?
  7. How could you get that wrong?

Questions you should ask your kids when they get home from school:

  1. How was your day?
  2. What did you do in school today?
  3. Anything interesting happened?
  4. How are your friends/teachers/the other people at school/etc?
  5. What did you have for recess?

Just ask the five simple, heartfelt, caring questions, and let the kids report the rest on their own. 
This shows that you are concerned primarily about their wellbeing, their experiences, and the people around them. Not their grades, how much better they are compared to their friends, or whether or not they are living up to your expectations.


Kiasu or kiasiaw?

Finnish edI don’t think we can have this here. All the kiasu parents will storm into the poor principal’s office and wring his/her neck. The principal will probably be bombarded with stuff like:

“I didn’t send my kids to your school for an hour of recess!”
– Yeah, I remember how we had to gobble up our food, pee and play tag in 15 minutes. So who do we blame again for our problems with indigestion?

“How would I know how my kids perform if there are no tests?”
– You see, over here, parents send their kids to perform. You know what people do on stage? They pretend. So when kids ace their tests, they are actually pretending they know stuff. Tra la la la la… Dum dee be dee dum dum…

“We didn’t pay you to let our kids have fun in school!”
– If it’s a public school, parents will complain about their tax contribution going to waste. If it’s a private school, the school board will be accused of swindling money. Ah… tightwads. Don’t have kids, then. Kids are supposed to have fun.

“How do our kids progress without homework?”
– Homework? Dude, your kids spend half a day/full day in school and you want them to come home with more workload. And then you complain about yourself having to work overtime or take your paperwork home. C’mon la! Give the kids a break. They are human beings like you. Well, maybe not you, since you’re turning them psychotic. They are going to end up in an asylum and you will have to spend their education fund on their psychiatric treatment. Wow… the irony of striving for academic intelligence only to get mental retardation in the end.

I don’t know what other nonsensical things parents will complain (and kick around like a freaking 2-year-old tantrum artist) about if our education system ever go the Finnish way. I still stand my ground that the education system in any Asian school is very much influenced, if not controlled, by the expectations of parents who are more kiasu than kiasiaw.