After six kids, I’ve finally learnt what giving my kids a better childhood means. After nine years of being a mum, it is only now that I’ve stumbled upon so many great support groups and child-prioritising facts all over the internet.
I’m upset that I didn’t get to know all these when I first had Joshua or any of the others before Danielle. I’m also upset that they all had to go through so much during my trial-and-error parenting times. The only way to make it up to them is by showing more love and trying very hard to be a less-screamy mother (I know, it’s sad, isn’t it?). Only screamy-mothers would understand how angry we are with ourselves two seconds after our outburst when we realise it’s just TWO WHOLE SECONDS too late to retrieve what we’ve just said to our kids. Life would’ve been so much easier for everyone had I known the things I know now.
It would’ve been easier for me to put the blame on old folks or people around me who kept telling me to limit the things I do for my kids so I wouldn’t spoil them. It would’ve been so much easier for me to say I’ve been misguided in my parenting skills by those around me. I was told not to carry my baby around all the time. I was told not to give in to my baby’s cries. I was told that babies are selfish and they would drain whatever they can off their parents i.e. energy, nutrients while in the womb and during breastfeeding, time, MONEY, etc… I was told so many negative things. But I can only blame myself for even giving them an opportunity to make me betray my own instinct as a mother to my children.
I’m going to list a few things (and I’m going to break them into a few parts so one post won’t seem so long) that makes parenting a great joy for both parent and child. When I said a great joy, I also meant a great sacrifice and for those of you who are not really prepared to drop everything else for your child, it will be more of a great struggle… probably even makes you a more miserable person.
But that’s parenting. You empty yourself totally for your children and expect absolutely nothing back. Not even your self-pampering time. You expect NOTHING. If and when you do get something back, that’s a huge bonus. But that should be the last thing on your mind because GOD is the first, then comes your spouse and then your children. Everything else can come later. Even yourself. When you care for the little (or big) family that God has entrusted to you, He will take care of you. So don’t worry about who’s going to care for you now that you’ve given up everything for your loved ones.
Click ‘Next’ for A new era of better ‘childhooding’ (Part 2)